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Because the Universe Insists... - Michael M Jones

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August 13th, 2009


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03:42 pm - Because the Universe Insists...
Dear Universe: I get the hint. Thanks. Love, me.

On that cryptic note, here's a post.
Yes, I have read Rosemary and Rue by seanan_mcguire. Yes, it's pretty good.

Here are the things I'm fairly certain it won't do:
1)Cure cancer.
2)Improve your sex life.
3)Save the economy.
4)Promote world peace (Wyld Stallyns will do it first.)
5)Make the new G.I. Joe movie any less of a disgrace.
6)Bring back 8-tracks.
7)Crank-call China when you're not at home. (That's the cat.)
8)Order Sham-Wow off the TV. (Again, the cat.)
9)Cook dinner for you.
10)Cuddle afterwards.

Here's what it will do:
1)Entertain you.
2)Amuse you.
3)Divert you for a while so the cat can steal your wallet.
4)Intrigue you.
5)Amaze you as to how much crap one author can put her protagonist through.
6)Impress you with the amount of fairy lore drawn on for the background.
7)Remind you of certain big-name urban fantasy authors, only with less sex and possibly more violence.
8)Hold down papers on your desk.
9)Crush small insects if they hold still.
10)Look good in a tuxedo. (Wait, that's me. I meant 'Entertain you.')

And that's all you're getting out of me. I've got deadlines, you see...
Current Mood: awakeawake

(4 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:rainfletcher
Date:August 13th, 2009 07:58 pm (UTC)
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Your cats have issues, man.
[User Picture]
From:oneminutemonkey
Date:August 13th, 2009 08:01 pm (UTC)
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Tell me about it. One stole a piece of chicken from between my lips the other night, and didn't even respect me in the morning.
[User Picture]
From:dornbeast
Date:August 19th, 2009 08:14 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Nowhere in that list did it say anything about the cats subscribing to any magazine...oh. Um, never mind.
[User Picture]
From:wiredwizard
Date:August 13th, 2009 08:09 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Wouldn't the cat be more likely to order a ShamMeow?

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